Ask any girl who has friendzoned a guy and we might get one of two possible answers.
One, is just that she is not interested, and will never ever be interested. Sorry, guys.
Two, is because the guy takes too long in courting.
I have a friend who has gone through this. At first, he likes her. She likes him too. He asks her out, texts her, and sends positive signals that say, “I’m interested in knowing you better.” After a while, however, the guy backs off a little bit, out of insecurity, perhaps. My friend is then left to wonder, “Does this guy really, really like me? Or is he just being nice, or worse, playing with my heart?”
She has waited. Too long. The guy wouldn’t make a move. Then another guy comes and sweeps her off her feet. He asks her out, gives the right signals, and in the end, gets the girl. The other guy is then left deep in despair, wondering if he did make a move, would he ever be with her? Oh, if only.
Ask any girl what they want in a guy and I believe that one of the most desirable traits is courage. Courage to ask her out. Courage to tell her the truth, although there is the risk of getting rejected. Courage to make a move.
Some guys just never do.
This is why bad boys win over nice guys. Because bad boys make a move. Nice guys usually just stand on the sideline, afraid to enter the battlefield. Afraid to take the risks.
So now the one-million-dollar question is: How long is the ideal courting period?
“Three months,” my girl friend said. “After that I will friendzone the guy.”
“About six months? From meeting to being in a relationship, that is,” another girl friend said.
“Well, I got together after two months so that works for me,” a girl friend said.
“It depends on how intense the courting and how often we meet,” a girl friend said. “If we meet each other everyday, one or two months might be enough, if not, perhaps three or four months, give and take.”
“One month is enough,” another said. “Three months is too long.”
Funnily enough, my friends never say a period of more than six months. The range differs from one to six, but never gone over it. Is this the effective courting period, then?
Well, as a side story, my sister’s boyfriend courted her for a year. By the end of it my sister has already given him ultimatum to make a move or else she will stop waiting. Is one year too long?
Well, interesting, isn’t it?
I think, we girls are used to give ourselves (or a guy) a deadline. If he doesn’t make any move, then he is not interested and we will turn off the partner switch and turn on the friend one. We will then stop waiting.
Of course, you need to be friends first before you start dating. I still believe the best relationship comes from being friends, and then slowly move into courting, and then boyfriend-girlfriend.
Well, just a warning guys: she will not wait forever. A girl’s courting period differs from another’s. If it gets too long, she’ll know. And you will too.
So guys, know what you want, have the balls, and make a move.