Marcella Purnama

Page 22

Marcella Purnama is a blogger and author of What I Wish I Had Known: And Other Lessons You Learned in Your Twenties. She is currently obsessed with finding the best recipe for bread rolls and keeping her sixteen plants alive.
517 articles written by Marcella Purnama

One author’s purpose

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Personal
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Words on paper really looks legitimate, you know? Like, really legitimate. It is as if it’s on print, then everything said is right. After all, it’s written there on a book!

That’s what I have in mind when I wandered aimlessly through Borders earlier today. In front of me are thousands of authors who have something to say and get the words out there. It’s as if all of their saying is true. Maybe. Maybe not.

When I ask myself why I want to be a writer, I often wonder if it’s stemmed from an egocentric point of view. Like, seriously, why do I want to tell people what I’m thinking anyway? It’s like wanting people to back you up, to think the same way as you, to agree with your standing. As a writer, why do I bother to share my stories, my experiences? Is it really to help people? Or is it simply because, well, I want my name to be out there?

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“I hope you live a life you’re proud of.”

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No one knows what they want to do when they are 22. Or at the very least, they know what they want to do, yet it may not be: a) realistic, b) visible, c) flexible, or d) set on stone.

If you ask me what I want to do in life, I will give you two kinds of answer. First is an abstract-ish reply, which is: to leave my mark in the world. Oh nevermind, cross that, it’s not realistic. It will be: being able to live well, send my kids to college, become financially stable, and achieve success in my own ways.

Second answer will be a more specific one: I want to write. Plain and simple, I just want to write. I want to publish books, I want to create stories. The problem with this answer is that writing may not put bacon on the table.

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I don’t know what love is

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Personal, Relationship
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My Mom always says that what I want from life today will be different to what I’ll want in one, two years’ time. As one grows older, so does her view in life. While I don’t appreciate being told that I’m-still-a-kid-and-I-don’t-know-what-decision-I’m-making kind of thing, deep down I know it’s true.

While having a catch-up session with my Melbourne friends the other day, we talked a bit about relationship. Mind you, I haven’t had a relationship talk for quite a while. Like, two or three years ago I was talking a lot about relationship, and even to this day I still receive some emails from strangers asking me for advice. While I’m not sure if I’m adequate enough to give an advice to someone, I find myself realising this simple truth: My advices, and my take on relationship, over time, change.

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I wish you were here, but you're not here, you're there. And there doesn't know how lucky it is.

Author Unknown

It’s good being a morning person after all

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Personal
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Call it jetlag. It’s been a couple of days since being back home from a country from the other side of the world (read: Canada) and I have found myself waking up at 5am, 6am, and 7am. If this is a normal morning wake-up call for you, I have got to applaud you, dear morning creatures. I used to wake up at 9.

I love sleep. Almost more than anything, really. What makes it weird is that I clearly lack sleep during my holiday trip, and when I got back home I have stopped functioning at 11pm and by around 6am, my brain starts beeping uncontrollably, forcing me to kick the blanket. If seven hours of sleep is always enough for you, well, usually I need at least 10.

Yes, I call it jetlag.

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I still suck at making choices

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Personal
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Really, I do.

No matter how many choices I’ve made – no matter how many wrong turns and right guesses, I still don’t know how to make one. If I don’t have to choose, I will have both options open – which will give me the liberty of having the best of both ends.

Alas, I can’t have my cake and eat it too.

In a week’s time I’m going have to choose if whether I want to take my Master’s degree. It’s starting in July, and I’ll be studying Publishing and Communication. But really, what if this degree is another education which burns tons of money that I would never need? What if this degree wouldn’t equip me with the dream job I need?

What if taking this Master’s turns out to be a wrong choice?

If it is, what’s the right choice then?

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Beautiful things don’t ask for attention

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I first heard those words in the movie The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. There, a famous photographer was waiting for a snow leopard to come out, up in the Himalayas. But when she did come out he just let the moment passed by. When Walter Mitty asked him why he didn’t take the picture, he said that if he really loved a moment, he didn’t take a photo of it. He just wanted to stay there in the moment. “Beautiful things don’t ask for attention,” he said. And it’s true.

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“I simply believe.”

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Personal, Swimming with The Sharks
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How do you find your passion? And when you finally discover it, how do you know for sure that it is your calling in life? If someone randomly walks to you and says, “You were born to do this,” would you believe them?

We know Roger Federer was born to play tennis. We also know Leonardo DiCaprio was born to act. We have not a single doubt that J.K. Rowling was born to be a writer.

What were you born to do?

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It’s not a matter of starting right

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Personal, Swimming with The Sharks
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Most fresh graduates I know are determined to start their careers right. In fact, almost all fresh graduates I know have grandeur dreams on how awesome their first job will be as an adult.

Thing is, only one in a million graduates will find that awesome first job. The others will have to settle with ordinary.

As a little child, all we ever want to do is to grow up. Growing up, in a sense, holds the key to the freedom we will have on living the life we have always dreamed of, yet never being able to reach. Being an adult is our ticket to a life free from the boundaries of our parents’ rules – we will discover the world on our terms. And that first job – that first full-time job with awesome salary after graduation will start the pace of the rest of our lives.

Of course, this is such a wrong notion, but how many of those graduates secretly believe that their first job dictates the rest of their career path? Quite a number.

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