One of my goals in life is to become a speaker at TED talk. Ambitious? Of course. Possible? Highly unlikely. Impossible? Not quite.

I love those talks. The speakers always have one thing they are passionate about – one idea that is worth spreading. In result, people look up to them as an expert in that particular area, and their influence towards hundreds and thousands and hundreds of thousands of people is simply amazing.

I want to stand there one day.  I want to stand in front of the crowd, imparting one piece of idea – one bit of advice in this life of mine that will inspire hundreds and thousands and hundreds of thousands of people.

There’s just one problem.

I have no idea what that one bit is.

Photo by urban_data

Photo by urban_data

All my life I envy those people who seem to know what exactly they are born to do. Back in high school, there was this awesome girl whose graphic design skills were just divine. Say she didn’t do well in other subjects, say, Maths. But she more than excelled at designing stuffs. Another friend was just born to create music. You could just tell by the way he played the tunes. It was like a form of religion by itself.

I wasn’t one of those persons. Still am not. During those teenager-ish years, I excelled at education. Not learning, but education. I got high marks and good scores and greater results to be showcased on my transcripts at the end of the semester. But I didn’t know my one thing. My center. My muse.

I have always wanted to be one of those persons. Everyone wants to be an expert at something instead of an ordinary one at many things. I just don’t know what my expertise is at. I am mediocre at writing. I am okay at communication. I am so-so at digital media.

You know, every successful person is an expert at something. Doubt it? Let’s play a one-word game. Write one word beside each name shown below:

Taylor Swift: singing.

Jeff Goins: writing.

Susan Cain: introversion.

Peter Jackson: directing movies.

Bill Gates: Microsoft.

Steve Jobs: Apple.

Of course, these one words don’t really define everything about them. But it’s something that they excel on, and people seek them based on these expertise.

Then I stumble upon this name.

Marcella Purnama:

And nothing. Like, I still have no idea how to fill in those blanks. Will I put writing there? Not really. I’m not an expert of writing, I am someone who happens to love writing and writes for a living. My blog is a compilation of random stories and various musings of all sorts. It is not targeted, nor oriented towards a particular topic.

Noted, I haven’t found my muse just yet. But I’m looking forward to the day I do.

What is my expertise? I really have no idea. If you have any kind of divine revelation of what kind of an expert am I, please let me know. Or share your stories! Like, have you found your muse? And if you do, how did you find it?