we don't deserve love

Ever since I discovered the haunting Hunger Games song by Taylor Swift last week, I have been infatuated with the trilogy all over again. It’s funny, because I didn’t fall in love with the series at the first sight.

In fact, reading my old reviews, I only give the books 3.5 rating. I remember being annoyed at Katniss for breaking down so many times throughout the second and third book, and how she couldn’t really decide between Peeta and Gale.

I guess, just like Finnick’s love for Annie, it creeps on me.

One particular part of the book that never leaves me is this: “You know, you could live a thousand lifetimes and not deserve him.”


Which gets me asking: do we deserve love?

Come to think of it, sometimes we are horrible persons. We act out of our best interests, hurting our loved ones in the process. We may lie to them, betray them, break their hearts. And all in all they are still there by our sides to love us.

In one of my old posts, I have also written about people accepting the love they think they deserve.

But who are we to say about who deserves who?

Love is not about deserving – we are loved not because we deserve to be loved. Love is a gift. It is a present given unconditionally.

Many people talk about love in terms of, “I don’t deserve you.” We have heard these words get spoken, or perhaps we have spoken them ourselves. We often think love as a scale – as a reciprocal act of deeds which needs to be balanced.

We think of love in terms of the sacrifices he makes in comparison to the sacrifices we make. Love, often, is a race of who loves more and who loves less.

But if we think it that way, then it’s not love, isn’t it? One of the most well known advices in relationship is to be the one who loves more. Which is easier said than done. The one who loves more sacrifices more, and perhaps, perhaps, gets hurt more. The one who loves less has more safety nets in case the heart gets broken.

Love is never about that. Love is not about who deserves who, because you and I, although we are good people, we can never deserve love. We have inflicted pain, hurt others, and left deep scars which may take years or forever to fade. Yet we still have people who love us. Yet we still love others.

Just like Katniss not deserving Peeta’s love, we don’t deserve ours. I guess Katniss never needs to deserve it – Peeta loves her, even though.

We don’t deserve love. We don’t deserve love because we don’t need to deserve it to be loved.

We love, and are loved because love simply does.


Photo by Dcampino