“If she’s worth it, she’s worth it.”

A reader posted these words on one of my posts which I really agree to. I have said this to a lot of people too many times. If someone tells me their love stories, the first thing I’ll ask is, “Is he worth it? Is he worth all the risks, pain, and troubles?” And if I get an ambiguous answer, well, we all know what that means.

Before all the troubles of analysing, thinking, and processing a relationship, I want people to be sure that the other party is definitely worth it. Even if the relationship doesn’t work out in the end, they will still say I’m glad I go through all these troubles, for he is worth it. I want to make sure.

Too many times people are not sure.

Yet after saying and asking all this time, I begin the wonder, what’s qualified as ‘worth it’?

worth it

You may think a guy who’s got a good job, a decent income, and a house is worth it. You may think being good is enough. You may want someone who can lay down his pride for you. Or all criteria before combined.

You may want someone who can lead. Or someone on whom you can respect. Or someone who respects you. You may want someone who prioritises you above everything.

And the list will go on.

So what’s worth it?

Worth it is something we tell ourselves that even though he hurts us time to time again, we’ll still fight for him. Worth it is something that we know for sure there’s a rainbow in the end, even though right now we can only see the storm. Worth it is a reassurance in its own kind, telling us that we are on the path of the pursuit of happiness, and we’ll definitely get there.

Worth it, is living with no regrets.

But who’s worth it?

The verdict’s different for different people, but for girls, I always say:

Find someone who will lay down his pride for you. Who will chase you. Who will not play the courting game. Treats you like a queen. Who respects you. Who will do A when he says A and B when he says B. Who wants to get to know your friends and family. Who can work. Who is humble. Who is loyal. Who loves you.

A man of principles.

For guys:

Find someone who will be true to you. Who will support you. Who will not put your hopes up high and throw it away the next day. Who is gentle, kind, and understanding. Who is not selfish.

A woman of compassion.

Someone who will fight for you.

Someone who is worth it.

Will you know for sure? To be honest, you won’t. You’ll have to believe.

And even if he’s worth it, it doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy.

There’s just this reassurance in the end: everything is going to be okay.

And it’s enough.


Ps. Are you getting married anytime soon? Did he just pop the question? Is he worth it? Well, do pay a visit to Bridestory to kickstart your wedding planning! It’s a website that has a full list of vendors and ideas to start your journey.